Day 17: What is your most proud moment?
This is probably one of the
best questions to get you thinking. Being 36 years old, I have made a lot of
achievements and a lot of failures in life. As I sit here, this question has me
doing a lot of deep thinking about what I have done in my life. Sitting down
and writing down my proud moments, I really can't sit here and write just one
down, because I have a few of them. My biggest one would be the days that I
became a mom. With each kid I was proud. I was proud of what I did, I was proud
of what I brought into this world. But there is a lot more that I am proud of
as well.
Leaving an abusive,
controlling, and destroyed relationship. This proud moment is right up there
with becoming a mom. I was in this relationship for way too long. I thought
that I was in love with him, heck I thought that he loved me, but towards the
end of our relationship that all changed. My attitude towards him started to
change, I saw that the way that he was treating me was wrong and the way that
he would talk to our children wasn't right. He would try to control everything
that I did, who I talked to, where I went, etc. Even though he had a job, he
wouldn't help pay the bills, everything came out of my paychecks, so in the end
I wasn't able to keep my cell phone going. He didn't mind that though because
that meant that I wasn't able to call people, not even my mom. I wasn't even
able to get the home phone going because at that time my paychecks covered our
rent, my car payment, power bill, gas bill, etc. It was the top proudest day
when I finally kicked him out of my life and my home. I struggled as a single
mom, but I didn't mind at all.
That brings me to my next
proudest moment. Being a single working parent isn't the easiest thing. I couldn’t
spend a lot of time with my kids, they were always at daycare and I was at
work. I had to split the weekends with the biological father (my ex that I
left), so spending the weekends with them wasn't the easiest thing to do. But I
was proud of everything that I was doing on my own. I was able to make sure
that I kept a roof over my children's head, food on the table, clothes on their
back. I made sure that I got a routine down with them every morning and every
night. I was proud of what I had accomplished with my kids.
The next proud moment that I
had was when I quit smoking 13 months ago. I had to quit smoking so that I
could my incisional umbilical hernia repair with mesh. I had tried to stop
smoking numerous times before in the past and I would do go for a while, but
then I would break down and start back up again. I was afraid that it would
happen again and that I wouldn't be able to get the surgery that I needed. But
here I am going 13 months strong and yes, I still have urges, especially when
my anxiety and stress get bad, but I have resisted those urges and keep pushing
through it.
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